They say that the trick to manifesting the life that you want is to be perfectly clear about your vision. Basically, you set your intention, you line up your resources, and you imagine the very thing that you wish to acquire. Simple right? Not really. Wherein mood and vision boards help us get started, what I’m learning is that we can dream all we like, but if we have limiting beliefs, then we will never get what we want.
What are limiting beliefs?
Limiting beliefs are systems that we acquire from past experience - be it in childhood or in adult life. These beliefs become part of our very core and subtly affect the way that we approach certain situations. For example, if an individual is told that he is “good for nothing” as a child, he may grow up to fear responsibility, or manage to have difficulty with his own self-esteem. His belief system is deeply embedded into his subconscious, affecting the way he now approaches his own life.
In my field I meet a lot of people who tend to self-sabotage without even knowing it. They want a happy life and a happy relationship but unconsciously they function with the belief that relationships need to be difficult in order to be happy. Did you catch that?
Self-sabotage is a term used by healers to explain how the belief systems of an individual may sometimes have an adverse effect on their reality. For example, in the borderline personality we see that there is a dysfunction in their beliefs and thus find it difficult to pull them away from their cycles. They may equate abusive personalities to love and thus have difficulty giving and accepting the love that they deserve.
The borderline has beliefs shaped from childhood, often influenced by the poor way they were treated by their caregivers. In fact, borderline personalities have difficulty with attachments and may tend to have terrible mood swings. And this all goes back to their belief systems.
Healing the subconscious
In psychotherapy, the schema (or the map of how one looks at his/her world) is what we work with in borderline personalities, as we try to shift their thinking. In recent years, I have also discovered that shifting the way one thinks is deeply rooted in the subconscious that may take years to heal.
However, having learned the art of meditation and hypnosis, I find that shifting the system on the subconscious can help rebuild an individual’s reality. So where does one begin if they want to manifest the life they always wished? With themselves.
1) Eliminate all doubt. You know how sometimes you think “Today is the day I’m going to win”…. but suddenly you also think, “well if God permits”. This second statement is a clear example of doubt. the slightest hint of doubt can bring you into a downward spiral. And this is why it is imperative that….
2) You can believe that you deserve what you are asking for. Do you feel that you truly deserve a happy life?…. or are there guilt feelings that may keep you from being the wonderful, magnificent person that you were made to be?
3) Bring all limiting beliefs to focus. Acknowledge all your “but” statements, and write them down. What’s limiting you? Who is limiting you (the answer is probably YOURSELF)? And what are the limitations you are willing to confront yourself?
4) Re-write your beliefs. Take a look at each statement and work on re-phrasing them. Avoid using negatives and work on using positive affirmations instead.
Trust me, when we work on ourselves, it is never easy, but you will be happy to know that the journey is always worth it. Here’s to hoping that you find life is an adventure and attract all your wishes and dreams with ease and grace.